Afraid of Being Abandoned Anymore

Afraid and alone,
You abandoned me.
You left me alone.
Just when I needed you,
You turned your back.
You said you would
Always be there for me,
But you were nowhere in sight
When my tears fell like rain.
There’s nothing left to do now,
Except be glad I made it,
And find a way to survive.
Hoping I heal.
Praying I smile.
Yearning to live.
Desiring to Love.
Maybe someday I’ll forget.
I’m already working on forgiving.
I have to forgive you.
You weren’t the only one to abandon me.
I abandoned myself.
I don’t want to be abandoned anymore.
I’m afraid I won’t make it.
It hurts to be deserted.

9-23-2000 Saturday
Written by Gail Brookshire

Being Someone’s Special Someone

Special to no one, that’s what I am.
Or should I say that’s what I am not.
I am not the thought that lays on one’s mind,
Not the one who get his blood boiling hot.
So many words can flatter a woman or man,
Yet even those are hard to come by.
Except of course when one wants to use me
If convenient enough for them to try.
I miss being special to a man,
Being the only one he could think of.
Spending every moment he had with me,
Telling me of his undying and faithful love.
Not a day would go by without a call.
Not a night would end without his voice.
Within every breath of sincerity,
I could tell I was his first and only choice.
I have been a sucker at times for some
Who convinced me I was special to them
Only to later find out I was the sucker
Who made it way too easy for him.
Someday I’ll be special again
To a man who will mean every word.
He will think too much of me
To ever have me waiting in second or third.
He will call to tell me good morning.
He me call to tell me good night.
He will call just to see how my day went
And make sure everything is alright.
And knowing my heart the way he will,
He’ll know my every prayer and wish
Is to know that everything is alright with him,
As I would so care about how he is.
My man who make me feel I am special to him
Because his heart will accept nothing less
Will be the simple hero my simple heart needs,
And to me he’ll be more than special, he’ll be the BEST.
Thank You, God, for thinking I am special,
For going to the cross to prove Your love for me.
Even when You send that Mr. Special into my life,
He will never be as special as You will always be.

7-2-2000 Sunday
Written by Gail Brookshire
Inspiration: bummed over not being someone’s special
PS… Lord, thank You for helping to KNOW I am someone special to You!