Tag: sad

Silently Inside

On By gaillovesgodIn 20191 Comment

Pain has come and pain has gone.
It’s up and down as life goes on.
Unwelcomed tears, still they came.
You must obey the rules of the game.
No room for fear. Nowhere to hide.
You can only cry aloud silently inside.

The voice will fade. The pain will too.
You must learn to breathe it through.
Trust the one instructing you.
Only they know what to do.
Leave those closing eyes open wide.
You can cry aloud silently inside.

Caught within a world of fury.
Self made judge and jury.
So much noise within the silence.
Penned beneath the raging violence.
Muffled within the voice that tried.
I heard you cry aloud silently inside.

Wasted life upon the floor.
Her Savior shouts, “They’ll be no more!
The life I made. The life I love
Will take no more push and shove!
My child, you need no longer hide.
I heard you cry aloud silently inside.”

2-3-2019 Sunday
Written by Gail Brookshire
“But I will sing of thy power; yea, I will sing aloud of thy mercy in the morning:
for thou hast been my defence and refuge in the day of my trouble.”
– Psalm 59:16 KJV

What Was Only Ours

On By gaillovesgodIn 20161 Comment

Samson, you disappoint me.
You let me down.
After so many years of nurturing,
Of personally preparing you,
And giving you strength like no other.
After everything you have meant to me,
I have meant so little to you
That you would kiss away that strength
With the breath from your lips.
Words that betray.
Words that reveal.
Words that invite the enemy
To take you away from me.
You have given yourself over to them.
And when you have awakened
From your lullaby of love,
You will find yourself abandoned…
Chained… imprisoned… and alone.
And the strength you’ve come to rely on
Will be gone.
How you grieve me.
How you break my heart.
You have allowed evil to separate us
When I long to hold you so close
And wish you had trusted me,
That you had protected what was only ours.

12-9-2016 Friday
Written by Gail Brookshire
Inspiration: Samson’s Secret Strength

Praying For Someone to Die

On By gaillovesgodIn 2011Leave a comment

Praying for someone to die,
Is that even right?
Are there moments, Lord,
When it is more selfish
To pray for good health
Instead of sweet release?
How would we know
When You are calling to them?
How do we know if the crying soul
Is asking for mercy when we don’t understand?
And yet, who are we to play God?
Even if our hearts are wrenched
In sympathy for the hurting.
God help us to pray.
May the Holy Spirit teach us how.
May we listen and learn.
And may our hearts, minds, and prayers
Be more what YOU want.

4-16-11 Written by Gail Brookshire
(by the grace of God)

Afraid of Being Abandoned Anymore

On By gaillovesgodIn 2000Leave a comment

Afraid and alone,
You abandoned me.
You left me alone.
Just when I needed you,
You turned your back.
You said you would
Always be there for me,
But you were nowhere in sight
When my tears fell like rain.
There’s nothing left to do now,
Except be glad I made it,
And find a way to survive.
Hoping I heal.
Praying I smile.
Yearning to live.
Desiring to Love.
Maybe someday I’ll forget.
I’m already working on forgiving.
I have to forgive you.
You weren’t the only one to abandon me.
I abandoned myself.
I don’t want to be abandoned anymore.
I’m afraid I won’t make it.
It hurts to be deserted.

9-23-2000 Saturday
Written by Gail Brookshire

We Struggle In A World

On By gaillovesgodIn 1993Leave a comment

We struggle in a world where children are dying to survive,
And there’s nothing we can do to keep them alive.
We sell their bodies and dope their brains.
We give them homes that drive them insane.
We clean out the alleys to service the rich,
To later leave bodies lying in a ditch.
We cancel the love to give the greed,
Caring not who hurts or if children bleed.
It’s sick. It’s insane. It’s way out of hand.
It’s something disgusting. I don’t understand.
Why are we here, if we’re only abusing?
Do you seriously believe this life is amusing?
I just can’t get it. I guess I never will.
Excuse me for living, I guess I tend to feel.

10-3-1993
Written by Gail Brookshire

Tired of Being Forgotten

On By gaillovesgodIn 1993Leave a comment

Frustrated, am I supposed to be or not?
I don’t know if I wanna be mad,
Or if I should be,
Or if I should just break down and cry.
Certainly NOT!
I shall never cry over something as simple
As being forgotten.
I know it’s not so simple,
And I know it’s ok to cry,
But if I do I’ll give up
All my strength I have left to fight with.
People…
They don’t care what I’m going through.
They only care about themselves.
They have no thought of someone else,
Unless it is to their benefit.
But that’s ok.
I’m too caught up in my own worries
To be of any help to them.
So I guess we understand each other,
Or at least I wish we did.
Maybe then they wouldn’t forget me.

9-27-1993 Monday
Written by Gail Brookshire
Inspiration: Feeling so unloved! Boo hoo hoo!
Awww! Poor little girl. Got forgotten and now she’s crying.
GROW UP!! No one ever asked for you to be put here,
So don’t go expecting things like acknowledgment of your existence!
PS.. The first part of this inspiration was how I used to talk to myself a lot,
And sometimes still get tempted to,
But God has taught me how to better love myself and others,
Because it’s all about loving Him, and loving others through and for Him.

Life Is Passing Me By

On By gaillovesgodIn 1992Leave a comment

Everything is going, going,
Almost gone.
How can I stop it?
Or just hang on?
I can’t get the message.
The point is so vague.
I can’t figure out
The mistake I’ve made.
What have I done
To lose so much?
What’s taking away
My magical touch?
How can it all
Just fall apart?
I know I can still love.
I feel it in my heart.
Somebody help me.
Saving my dying life.
I just want someone
To break the strife.
Soul searching… help.
I’m quickly getting weak.
I can’t take the emptiness.
My eyes begin to leak.

12-22-1992 Tuesday
Written by Gail Brookshire

Someone’s Dead

On By gaillovesgodIn 1992, UncategorizedLeave a comment

Someone’s dead, and everything’s wrong.
I know I loved him, but grief is strong.
Death is the victor in this game,
But everyone says there’s no one to blame.
A bullet in the mouth and out the ear,
It’s not an easy accusation. The killer’s clear.
Many won’t admit, as they only deny.
Some can’t believe, as many cry.
So how are we going to get past
The love we lost in him? Pain lasts.
We’ve lost many before, many just as close,
But we can’t accept what the world already knows.
Death, the suicide doctor, of the patient lost in darkness.
No one can help him once the doctor has given his best.
We walk away. The tombstone is written for swollen eyes.
The message to read, “As Free As The Eagle Flies.:

5-5-1992 Tuesday
Written by Gail Brookshire
Inspiration: My Cousin Dean Harris Lance
1-25-72 to 5-26-1991

Agony Over the Eagle

On By gaillovesgodIn 1992Leave a comment

There’s a pain of agony that just can’t be understood,
When a teenager takes a shotgun
and blows it through his mouth and out his ear.
No one can explain the tragic event,
Or know what he was thinking.
All we can know is that it happened.
And when it did it took the one we loved so much.
I don’t know why he did it, but I wish I could take it back.
I wish it was just a nightmare,
A nightmare that no one can bring to reality.
Why did it have to be my cousin?
He was so young and loved.
What could he have possibly been thinking
When he pulled that trigger?
He was so optimistic and had plenty of friends and family,
A beautiful fiance,
and so much that you would have thought he was happy.
But maybe he wasn’t.
It’s so hard to explain a heartache,
And a heartache is hard to handle.
Maybe he just couldn’t handle what he couldn’t explain.
I don’t know.
I just know I love him and miss him so much.
Please give him back.
Forever in agony over the eagle.

2-24-1992 Monday
Written by Gail Brookshire
Inspiration: Dean. I love you! ❤

Stolen By Heart

On By gaillovesgodIn 19924 Comments

You took everything away from me.
Every reason to live.
To love.
To cry.
To laugh.
Why did you do it?
You stole everything from me.
I only loved you in return.
Why did you steal my right to love you?
It was my choice to make, but you made the decision.
You thief.
You stole my heart.
My love.
I can’t forget it.
Because I can’t forget you.
It’s so hard.
But I love you.
Please come back.
Say it isn’t true. That it never was.
That it was just a bad dream.
A horrible nightmare that will never happen again.
Please. I love you.

2-4-1992
Written by Gail Brookshire
Inspiration: the loss of a loved one

Death Overrules

On By gaillovesgodIn 1992Leave a comment

My tears just aren’t enough.
I don’t know what will ever bring you back.
Because I know no one and nothing can, except God.
But He’s the one who allowed You to leave us.
It’s just no use… Death Overrules.
It’s the only thing we can come to terms with.
It’s an overwhelming… overpowering
Force of Spirit that takes off to intrude.
What would you expect me to say now?

1-30-1992 Thursday
Written by Gail Brookshire
Inspiration:D

Buried In Love

On By gaillovesgodIn 1991Leave a comment

As the rain to the soil,
My tears are pouring down.
My knight has lost the battle.
He lies here on the ground.
I cannot wake his wounded heart.
He will not lift his eyes.
Oh, my soul is aching now.
My heart is paralyzed.
Someone take away my pain,
And restore the life of my knight.
My world could never dawn again.
I’m imprisoned within the night.
By his side lies his sword.
I draw it back to lance.
I fall upon his lifeless soul.
We become a buried romance.

3-4-1991 Monday
Written by Gail Brookshire

FEELING DOWN

On By gaillovesgodIn 1990Leave a comment

I feel so sad, and I don’t know why.
But I just know that I do.
It’s like somebody died.
Who? – I don’t know.
Why? – I don’t know.
Where? – I don’t know!
Being so depressed… it’s boring.
Being so bored… it’s depressing.
Yet it seems as though it would be useless to socialize.
I feel as though nothing could make me smile.
Like it would be one big terrible lie to even try.
I’m so sad. I don’t know why.
I only know that I am. I’m sorry.
But it is human too.

12-17-1990 Monday
Written by Gail Brookshire
The Lord is nigh unto them that are of a broken heart; and saveth such as be of a contrite spirit. – Psalm 34:18 KJV
The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit: a broken and a contrite heart, O God, thou wilt not despise. – Psalm 51:17 KJV
For thus saith the high and lofty One that inhabiteth eternity, whose name is Holy; I dwell in the high and holy place, with him also that is of a contrite and humble spirit, to revive the spirit of the humble, and to revive the heart of the contrite ones. – Isaiah 57:15 KJV
For all those things hath mine hand made, and all those things have been, saith the Lord: but to this man will I look, even to him that is poor and of a contrite spirit, and trembleth at my word. – Isaiah 66:2 KJV

Are You Watching?

On By gaillovesgodIn 1990Leave a comment

Fly… fly away with me.
We’re going to soar above the skies… rise above the clouds…
And gaze upon the earth, and the beauty of the land.
We’ll come to the graveyards… and pause for a moment…
…a moment of silence.
As I float above the tombstone,
I’m quietly and inwardly saying how much I miss her…
And how much I still love her.
If only she were still alive (I whisper to myself).
A tear falls from my eye and as it begins to pour,
I feel a gentle and soft hand come from behind me and catch it
Before I have the chance to feel the moistness of my heartache.
She has dried it away.
Out of joy… surprise… and happiness,
I turn to hold her,
And as we embrace we draw back and smile at each other.
The only words she has to say to me are,
“Fly… fly away with me.”
I’m sorry. I forgot to say farewell to you my loved ones,
As she once did to me.
I love you. I’ll always be with you.

12-11-1990 Tuesday
Written by Gail Brookshire
Inspiration: a dear soul

Loving Was a New Flame

On By gaillovesgodIn 1990Leave a comment

We were friends for the moment.
We were friends for the years.
We were friends with the laughter.
We were friends with the tears.
We were friends after all the pain.
We were friends after the fight.
We were always friends in life,
And then you were taken in the night.
I miss the way we use to laugh,
And the things we’ve said.
I try to let you rest in peace,
But I just can’t forget.
Upon your tombstone, your name is written,
And so are these words,
“We were always friends,
And we will be forever.”

12-7-1990 Friday
Written by Gail Brookshire
Inspiration: the loss of a dear friend