Tag: personal

My Faithful Prince of Peace

On By gaillovesgodIn 20172 Comments

Shutter… I shake an inward concern.
My how your fear invades.
To give voice to your presence,
Terror cascades.
And therein lies the flaw.
The key to the guarded gate.
But there is a warrior
Who anticipated this fate.
He is strong and very present.
Shielded with armor in hand.
He will not allow entrance
To this promised land.
This is a place
That He promised me.
I am safe to be unguarded.
I am safe to be free.
Weapon dismantled,
You are cast to your knees.
I have been protected
By my Faithful Prince of Peace.

1-11-2017 Wednesday
Written by Gail Brookshire
Inspiration: a safe place

What Was Only Ours

On By gaillovesgodIn 20161 Comment

Samson, you disappoint me.
You let me down.
After so many years of nurturing,
Of personally preparing you,
And giving you strength like no other.
After everything you have meant to me,
I have meant so little to you
That you would kiss away that strength
With the breath from your lips.
Words that betray.
Words that reveal.
Words that invite the enemy
To take you away from me.
You have given yourself over to them.
And when you have awakened
From your lullaby of love,
You will find yourself abandoned…
Chained… imprisoned… and alone.
And the strength you’ve come to rely on
Will be gone.
How you grieve me.
How you break my heart.
You have allowed evil to separate us
When I long to hold you so close
And wish you had trusted me,
That you had protected what was only ours.

12-9-2016 Friday
Written by Gail Brookshire
Inspiration: Samson’s Secret Strength

The Bridge

On By gaillovesgodIn 2017Leave a comment

The bridge… that bridge that draws me in.
That bridge that beckons me to cross.
That beckons me, “Come.”
From one side to another
Beauty conquers my fear.
Beneath… a flow that streams…
A stream that flows.
With every passing trickle
Life runs cold.
It’s a rocky bottom…
That hard floor with a soft bed,
Laid exquisitely between the mountains.
And underneath the blue sky…
That Blue Ridge Canvas.
It’s the perfect spot.
I have fallen in love…
Time and time again…
With that bridge that overlooks
The passing beauty.

3-21-2017 Tuesday
Written by Gail Brookshire

Speak No Leak

On By gaillovesgodIn 2005, UncategorizedLeave a comment

Speak… no leak.
The clues must not be.
All the foes who seek
Will know how to weaken me.
Wink… think shrink.
Be careful not to expose.
One link could make me sink
If they are allowed to know.
Start… smart.
Don’t let the bright shine in.
Cart the heart
And secure the word within.
Roses… hoses.
Things outside can harm.
Moses poses
With all his Godly charm.

10-19-2005 Wednesday
Written by Gail Brookshire

Isolated For Christ

On By gaillovesgodIn 2005Leave a comment

Isolated for a cause,
I search for a way to survive.
It’s not so tragic to try.
Christ had to strive.
No friends, no lover,
I must answer on my own.
Still my heart cries,
“It’s not good for [woman] to be alone.”
Church family accompanies.
Christians uplift each other.
But they have their own families.
They do not need another.
Days are so long.
Nights are even longer.
Fond memories of laughter
Make it hard to be stronger.
I do want to walk my walk.
I do want to talk my talk.
I just wanted to share the path
Without provoking God’s wrath.

7-31-2005 Sunday
Written by Gail Brookshire

He Has Come to Dwell

On By gaillovesgodIn 2018Leave a comment

Memories that linger,
But not for their pleasure.
They stay at length,
But not for good measure.
Days that were endless
Remind me they’re long gone,
But nights that were relentless
Seem to stay strong.
Nightmares and visions,
Unwelcomed and uninvited
Keep me and serenity
Cruelly divided.
But there is a Watchman
Who guards at my chest.
My racing heart beat
Sends Him on a quest.
Angry with evil
For choking my world,
My Knight arrives
And draws His sword.
Peace, love,
And renewing thoughts.
My Savior has won
The battle He fought.
He has returned my night
And my sleep as well.
I’ve no more to fear.
He has come to dwell.

11.14.2018 Wednesday
Written by Gail Brookshire
PS… You gave me the words to write this poem then had me think on Your hymn called, “How Can I Fear With Jesus?” As I began to sing it, I was in awe of how similar they were.
I just had to blog about it on gaillovesgod. It can be read here.
You make me fall more and more in love with You each day. No matter what comes (and it inevitably will), it will have to face You my faithful Savior who has come to dwell! ❤

Family of Six

On By gaillovesgodIn UndatedLeave a comment

We grew up together, yet so far apart.
Then we separated, even at heart.
Time came to reunite us once again.
But soon the destruction would begin.
Well now we have grown so together.
Yet live separately, a family forever.

Written by Gail Brookshire
Inspiration: My family – the Brookshires

A Friendship Confused

On By gaillovesgodIn UndatedLeave a comment

Gail is wondering what to do.
She can’t do anything that pleases you.
Not that she cares or even knows.
It’s just so aggravating at the way it goes.
You think it’s funny for people to cry.
When they leave, you wonder why.
You can’t have a friend, if you can’t be one yourself.
This world’s for everyone, not just yourself.
You joke about the way you treat your friends.
Never caring or understanding why it ends.
You’re so pathetic, I feel sorry for you.
What’s a lonely little girl supposed to do?

Written by Gail Brookshire

My Dream Come True

On By gaillovesgodIn 2003Leave a comment

I had this dream once.
I dreamt that I was special, that things were going to change.
I dreamt that this special man would come along,
Find me to be special and wait!
I dreamt that this man was after God’s own heart,
And that he would help me to be a woman after God’s own heart.
That he would want me to be a woman after God’s own heart.
That he would be a man I could count on to lead me,
As I believe in Your word that a man us to lead.
I love Your design of men and women.
I longed to be led by this man, despite the fact I feared to trust a man.
And then I ruined it.
The dream turned into a nightmare and then the dream was gone.

I gave away that right to be special to find I wasn’t special at all,
At least not to the man I trusted.
He did not respect my wish to be faithful to God,
To honor my Savior in testimony.
He did not respect the walk I was struggling to continue.
Instead of helping me to be a woman after God’s own heart,
He helped me to be a woman who betrayed God’s own heart.
While I know I could have stopped it,
He stole my trust in thinking he was safe to trust.
And while I became defenseless on God’s behalf,
I made it clear from the beginning where my heart was,
What my intentions were,
And how weak I could be given the wrong circumstances.
Instead of being my strength, he was my weakness.
Instead of making my dreams come true, he took my belief in the dream.

Please give me back the dream.
I don’t want to give up the dream.
I want to believe that someone REALLY thinks I’m special and worth the wait.
I want to know a man who really IS a man after Your own heart.
A man who not only respects me, but oh Lord, respects YOU!
I want a man that I can trust to lead me, to support me,
To want me to BE a woman after Your own heart.
It seems like such an impossible dream,
But Your word tells me that with You nothing is impossible.
If it is what You want FROM me, I know it is what You will give TO me.
Because You DO think I am special.
After all, You made me and love purity!
Be my dream. Make my dream anew. Be my dream come true.

11-14-2003 Friday
Written by Gail Brookshire
PS. Thank You, Jesus, for being my dream come true all these years!
YOU make me special! ❤

People Are Scary

On By gaillovesgodIn 20002 Comments

People are so scary.
They hurt you, betray you,
And change your life forever.
Whether good or bad.
They put on such faces.
A smile can hide a killer.
A wink can hide deception.
What does it really mean
To trust someone
When we really never know anyone?
It is so scary to trust,
To even know people.
They can be so evil.
And even when they are good,
They can come with expectations
That I will not be mean or evil,
And that I cannot guarantee.
That is even scarier.
I am a person.
People are so scary.

10-30-2000 Monday
Written by Gail Brookshire

What I Think of My Thoughts

On By gaillovesgodIn 2000Leave a comment

If in one moment I stopped and gave a thought
To the thoughts I carry within,
I wouldn’t think much of those thoughts
That aren’t so very nice, my friend.
The world has played its games.
The world has toyed enough.
I’ve got to get past this sweetness,
And remember to be tough.
God asked me to love and I loved.
I loved one another and the other.
But I guess the others forgot to love me back
Because I wouldn’t be their lover.
Oh, deception is a lie.
When you call that love,
You haven’t even tried.
So what would I have to say
To those, to me, and to my God?
The thoughts I keep aren’t Christlike.
I pray that they be not.

8-3-2000 Thursday
Written by Gail Brookshire

My Silent Rage

On By gaillovesgodIn 2000Leave a comment

You think so much of me.
You think me to be nice.
You do not know the rage I carry,
And how I pay the price.
But that has got to stop right now,
As I finally come of age.
Thirty years too late I stand,
I storm throughout the rage.
The pain, the lies, the deception and games.
I have been the fool.
But I am not willing to take that blame.
I’m breaking the number one rule.
Silence is not my friend
When it allows you to crush my spirit.
You can try to reason why it is,
But I refuse to even hear it.
You see me on the ground crawling for help,
My soul has been wrung out.
But Christ my Savior has lifted me,
And freed me of guilt and doubt.
The evil are the evil,
And have no other name.
Regardless of what is said,
I will not carry their shame.
Your help is not sincere.
Your deeds are not unseen.
I suggest you give your please to Christ
Before the final scene.

7-26-2000 Wednesday
Written by Gail Brookshire

My Silent Pain

On By gaillovesgodIn 20004 Comments

Scream, scream
At the top of my lungs.
My silent pain
Imprisoned by my tongue.
Bang with my fists,
My anger outraged.
I’ve pretended too long.
Time to get off your stage.
Glare with a look
That shouts, “STOP!”
I do not let your bubble grow.
I gladly poke and pop!
Charades and lies,
It’s all the same,
As friends and lovers
Within hidden names.
I do not care
If you dance.
I only avoid
Any of your romance.
You offer me treasure.
You offer me pain.
I’ve been crazy long enough.
I’m no longer that sane.
Crawl, crawl,
You retreat with regret.
I tried to warn you.
Too bad you forget.

7.26.18 Wednesday
Written by Gail Brookshire
Inspiration: Don’t worry about it. I don’t.
PS. Sometime when I feel anger, I choose to put in writing so that it can come and go, Lord willing, with no consequences.. Better to get it out that to let it bottle up. God taught me not to go to bed angry if possible. And along the way He has given my far more joy… in Him! 🙂

To God and All

On By gaillovesgodIn 20002 Comments

An apology is in order and I am the one who owes the apology.
I owe an apology to God and all who have hurt me.
For so long I have been bitter and hard hearted
Because of all the hardship I have endured
To only gain heartache, betrayal, and cheated of my dreams.
And yet for everything I have been so bitter about,
It was only possible for them to happen
By something being wrong within me to allow it.
And I am not totally innocent either.
I have played my role in my own heartaches.
This I have not denied at all.
However, I have been the one to make the decisions
That eventually caused the probability.

I have been most hurt by fellow Christians
Who have taken pleasure in my pain, inflicting that pain,
And carry on as though it is only Christlike to allow myself to be done so.
Yet I have a mouth to say, “No. That is not what Christ would have me do.”
I have the ability to say, “I’m sorry. Whether you agree or not,
Understand or not, I cannot do what you ask.”
I have the capability to stand up and say, “That hurts.”
And now that things are said and done,
And my once supportive friends leave me alone
To fight my battle and heal my own wounds,
I have the knowledge to know God cares and IS my Healer.
If anything, the paths in which I have been walking
Were going in just the direction God so designed,
Regardless of what others say.

I have always kept God first… even in the midst of my sinning.
My prayers have never ceased.
Decisions that were made and broke my heart to make,
Were done in following God and trusting Him,
That leading me away was for a purpose.
Though others may have been hurt and confused,
As I was in my obedient walk,
I obeyed my Lord and Savior and have no reason to regret.
There is much I don’t understand, but there is one thing I have never doubted…
God has been the one to lead me down these roads,
And walks with me all the way on each one.
And anything that happens along the way, builds me for Him.

Therefore I owe an apology to my Lord for complaining,
For crying, for doubting, for carrying guilt or regret in my decisions.
I owe an apology to all who hurt me for the bitterness I have carried toward you
For the roles in which God has set for me to endure.
The pain you have inflicted has been His teaching.
Your betrayal has been His moments to draw me closer to Him,
And for Him to draw closer to me.
These times have been times I have felt His stronghold.
I have gained strength that I am to share even with those who have hurt me.

Jesus died for all… including those who betrayed Him.
Who am I to think I deserve to understand why fellow Christians would betray me
When Jesus was betrayed by His very own disciples, His friends, His companions,
His community, His followers, the crowd, His church leaders,
And all that nailed Him to the cross to die?
That group would include me.
I was a part of the crowd.
I have played my role in betraying Him and yet He is not bitter toward me.
He is more loving and forgiving every day.
He picks me up and leads me through this wilderness of life.
He comforts my broken heart and renews my shattered dreams.
His heart’s desire is for you and I to love one another,
And rebuke one another when needed.

I extend my apology to all those who read this and let you know
I pray for you each.
I especially want to apologize to those whom were the guilty
In betraying me, hurting me, taking advantage of me,
And still thinking nothing wrong of it to this day…
I forgive you.
You could not have hurt me without my allowing you to.
And if standing up to someone was the cause of my pain,
Then there is nothing to regret.
Instead there is much to pray for on your behalf before the Lord.
I will be your love and support regardless, just as He is mine.
And if you hurt me or abuse my friendship, I will tell you
And not allow you to do so.
Instead I will draw our attention back to the cross
And the Friend who hung on it for you and I.

Thank you for being a part of my life,
Even in the painful part…
Thank you for allowing my Lord to help me grow.
And Lord, my Father, I thank You for thinking of me
Enough to teach me, to protect me, and to stand up for me.
Thank You for never leaving me or thinking less of me.
I will try to think more of others and their pain
Whenever I am consumed with mine.
I love You.

6-18-2000 Sunday
Written by Gail Brookshire
Inspiration: getting past the bitterness

Afraid of Being Abandoned Anymore

On By gaillovesgodIn 2000Leave a comment

Afraid and alone,
You abandoned me.
You left me alone.
Just when I needed you,
You turned your back.
You said you would
Always be there for me,
But you were nowhere in sight
When my tears fell like rain.
There’s nothing left to do now,
Except be glad I made it,
And find a way to survive.
Hoping I heal.
Praying I smile.
Yearning to live.
Desiring to Love.
Maybe someday I’ll forget.
I’m already working on forgiving.
I have to forgive you.
You weren’t the only one to abandon me.
I abandoned myself.
I don’t want to be abandoned anymore.
I’m afraid I won’t make it.
It hurts to be deserted.

9-23-2000 Saturday
Written by Gail Brookshire