Single Depression

Depressed as usual… that’s the way it is for single people sometimes.
Oh we want to be brave and pretend we never get down because we are alone,
But who do we think we are kidding?
People in relationships know what we are missing out on,
And other singles know exactly what we’re lying about
Because they are lying about it too.

The fact is that we know we love the idea of sharing some time with someone special,
Would love to have someone to talk about things with,
Someone who knows what’s going in our lives because they are sharing it with us.
We love the idea of someone caring whether we come home or not,
If we feel well or not,
If we’ve had a bad day or not.
We want someone to tell our troubles to
Because we want someone else to reassure us everything will be okay,
And that if things get any worse, they will be still be there…
And best yet… know they will be.

So many people are going out on the weekends.
So many couples are staying in with the kids.
But single people are going from moment to moment,
With no guarantee that anyone will care what we do each day.
Families and friends are what we rely on
Because we know how special they are and love us,
But everyone (including family and friends) know we want companionship.

Yes, this is a moment that will pass and no I am not one to dwell.
But in all honesty, I am as human as the next person.
I, too, ponder the idea of sharing a life with someone.
For now I will smile and put on a happy face,
But for all those who read this and know what I am talking about,
Take comfort in knowing someone knows what you’re feeling
And says it’s quite normal and okay…
Sometimes I do too.

1-21-2000 Friday
Written by Gail Brookshire
Inspiration: Need I have one?

More Faith or Heart?

What are we supposed to do
When live in a world where no one is allowed to love?
What are we supposed to believe
When we hold our faith in the great God above?
Are we supposed to believe that we are exempt from passion…
Even if it’s in love and marriage?
Why are some of us destined to be alone…
Or rather unmarried?
I know we’re never alone,
But why are we sometimes so isolated that we feel deserted?
We should be able to focus our love and companionship on Jesus.
He was alone in companionship too/
And He was never married.
Yes He traveled and lodged with the disciples,
But that wasn’t 24 hours a day,
And it wasn’t every day of His life.
He even spent time alone with God in the wilderness.
Tempted by Satan in every way.
Yet He gloriously triumphed
And resisted the worldly treasures.
So why do we feel alone when Jesus is so with us
And knows exactly how we feel?
Could it be we need more faith?
Or more heart?

6-29-1996 Saturday
Written by Gail Brookshire

Destined to Tear

Tears… shed in the midst of a late cold night.
A loneliness swallows you whole… completely.
It’s a feeling that only my aching soul can agonize.
No one will ever understand,
Because no one can see what’s going on in my mind.
They’re only able to see it in my leaking eyes.
My eyes that release the truth…
Found within my heart.
Why can’t I escape this journey just one night?
Is it so bad to go without a teared facial, once?
Just once?
Can’t I escape the rip just once more?
My seams are wearing thin.
Please give my crying eyes a relief from their destiny.
My life is overflowing.

2-25-1992 Tuesday
Written by Gail Brookshire
PS. God is my hero!

To Have And To Hold

So many times I have dreamed for someone to hold me, sometimes of being held by someone who loves me.
Sometimes I have went as far as to hurt myself and break my own heart in desperation to feel that special.
Yet all along there has been Someone holding me who loves me so much that He stretched out His arms and died for me.
He loves me so much, He’s there for every hug I need.
He is so full of love that He stretched out His arms and died for my family, my friends, strangers, and everyone in the world.
So many times He’s tried to keep me from breaking my own heart.
So many times He’s urged me to be careful.
But I in my stubbornness have insisted I knew what was best, and in the end broke my heart and His.
Did He leave me? Get tired of fooling with me?
Get angry? Did He stop holding me?

He opened His arms even wider, held me even tighter, and told me He would always love me.
Then He reminded me of how much love He gave to me.
He reminded me of all the people in the world who feel they have no one who loves them.
All they want is a hug.
They want to feel special to someone.
Some just want to matter to someone else.
He taught me how to open my arms to “give” love.
As He had me recollect my memories, I saw I have had a million or more hugs in my life.
And while they may not have all meant the world to me, I remembered (and in some cases first realized) how much they meant to the world.
The love felt within those embraces brought back the tears I’ve shared with many of God’s children in sorrow.
Sometimes they were tears of joy.

God made me realize I was not put on this earth to be loved.
He already loved me from birth.
I was given life that I might share love with others.
I need to share with them the most important love of all, the love of Jesus Christ Our Lord.
There are so many people in the world suffering from hunger, loneliness, abandonment, a feeling of worthlessness, and the desire to be loved.
Who am I to dwell in such self pity from thinking “Oh, what if I never love again?”
If God is in my heart and I try to reach out for Him, I will be loving others every day of my life.
Why do I selfishly whine to myself “What if no one ever loves me?”
If I believe that God sent His Son to die for me and that Jesus chose to do it, surely I know They both acted out of love, and will never stop loving me.
Jesus’ blood and love binds me forever.

True love… it’s what I waste my God’s valuable time daydreaming of, but true love follows the love of God, and yearns to share it with the suffering and lost so that they may know of love.
True love… honors Jesus Himself with a love of obedience, and a love filled with compassion for those whom He died for.

So many times I’ve dreamed for someone to hold me, sometimes of being held by someone I love.
I have often wondered “What if I die never being held again?”
But God has burdened my heart with the sorrow of souls who are dying to be held just once.
I want to comfort those souls with the arms that God gave me.
I want to give them the love that Jesus shares with me.
I want to do everything God knows me to be able to do for the people that my Savior Jesus Christ died for.
I want them to know that Jesus loved them enough to shed His blood for them.
I see that God did not intend for me to be held, but to hold.
As I strive to do His will, I take comfort in knowing He will always be there to hold me in His loving and faithful arms.

7-14-1998 Tuesday
Written by Gail Brookshire
Inspiration: When I went to the nursing home to visit my Aunt Mildred, a lady in her facility saw me hug my aunt and mentioned how lucky she was to get a hug. When I hugged the lady, she started crying as she thanked me. She held onto me so. And I held onto her. I cried all night for her. The Lord opened my eyes to so many people in the world who long for a hug. I have witnessed many children so abused by their parents or by whomever their parents abandoned them to never receiving hugs. Some children are so starved for hugs that it makes them an easy target for molestation and/or prostitution. Even grown adults can be so starved for a simple hug that it can lead to choices one would never think they would make, and some never able to get away from those choices. How much we need to be willing to give that hug. How much people need to know that God loves them! ❤