No Flowing Beauty <3

I am a heart full of love,
Drowning in a sea of loneliness.
No one swims within my waters,
Nor walks along my beaches.
I am so alone… and so lonely.
Never have I felt so unattached,
So incomplete,
So undernourished.
To be without love is like having not one drop
Of water left in my sands.
I have no flowing beauty.
The tides have battled my shores, profusely.
They’re all washed out.
Why must you pretend you want to wade within me?
Can you not see you only torture me?
You add more poison to my erosion.
Forever in longing.

11-5-1996 Tuesday
Written by Gail Brookshire

God’s Disabled Pen

My pen… it’s disabled.
It has ink.
It is in a capable hand,
and is in the hand of a writer…
a good writer, a gifted writer, God’s writer,
and yet it cannot write.
This writer has words, profound words,
to express,
a flood of thoughts that are drowning me out,
but I seem to have a gate or wall
blocking the flow of my pen.
Does it matter to anyone that I can’t?
Does anyone really want to read it?
Does anyone really need to read it?
Does it really need to be written?
My soul is crying, “Yes, please, I can’t breathe!”
I need to get these things out,
yet no one but me and God knows what they are.
Does God care if I get them out or not?
I think He does or else He would not speak them to me.
God, help me to do with these words and thoughts
as You want me to do,
that I might serve You
and give You all the glory.
Praise You for the word.

4-11-01 Written by Gail Brookshire
(by the grace of God)