To God and All

An apology is in order and I am the one who owes the apology.
I owe an apology to God and all who have hurt me.
For so long I have been bitter and hard hearted
Because of all the hardship I have endured
To only gain heartache, betrayal, and cheated of my dreams.
And yet for everything I have been so bitter about,
It was only possible for them to happen
By something being wrong within me to allow it.
And I am not totally innocent either.
I have played my role in my own heartaches.
This I have not denied at all.
However, I have been the one to make the decisions
That eventually caused the probability.

I have been most hurt by fellow Christians
Who have taken pleasure in my pain, inflicting that pain,
And carry on as though it is only Christlike to allow myself to be done so.
Yet I have a mouth to say, “No. That is not what Christ would have me do.”
I have the ability to say, “I’m sorry. Whether you agree or not,
Understand or not, I cannot do what you ask.”
I have the capability to stand up and say, “That hurts.”
And now that things are said and done,
And my once supportive friends leave me alone
To fight my battle and heal my own wounds,
I have the knowledge to know God cares and IS my Healer.
If anything, the paths in which I have been walking
Were going in just the direction God so designed,
Regardless of what others say.

I have always kept God first… even in the midst of my sinning.
My prayers have never ceased.
Decisions that were made and broke my heart to make,
Were done in following God and trusting Him,
That leading me away was for a purpose.
Though others may have been hurt and confused,
As I was in my obedient walk,
I obeyed my Lord and Savior and have no reason to regret.
There is much I don’t understand, but there is one thing I have never doubted…
God has been the one to lead me down these roads,
And walks with me all the way on each one.
And anything that happens along the way, builds me for Him.

Therefore I owe an apology to my Lord for complaining,
For crying, for doubting, for carrying guilt or regret in my decisions.
I owe an apology to all who hurt me for the bitterness I have carried toward you
For the roles in which God has set for me to endure.
The pain you have inflicted has been His teaching.
Your betrayal has been His moments to draw me closer to Him,
And for Him to draw closer to me.
These times have been times I have felt His stronghold.
I have gained strength that I am to share even with those who have hurt me.

Jesus died for all… including those who betrayed Him.
Who am I to think I deserve to understand why fellow Christians would betray me
When Jesus was betrayed by His very own disciples, His friends, His companions,
His community, His followers, the crowd, His church leaders,
And all that nailed Him to the cross to die?
That group would include me.
I was a part of the crowd.
I have played my role in betraying Him and yet He is not bitter toward me.
He is more loving and forgiving every day.
He picks me up and leads me through this wilderness of life.
He comforts my broken heart and renews my shattered dreams.
His heart’s desire is for you and I to love one another,
And rebuke one another when needed.

I extend my apology to all those who read this and let you know
I pray for you each.
I especially want to apologize to those whom were the guilty
In betraying me, hurting me, taking advantage of me,
And still thinking nothing wrong of it to this day…
I forgive you.
You could not have hurt me without my allowing you to.
And if standing up to someone was the cause of my pain,
Then there is nothing to regret.
Instead there is much to pray for on your behalf before the Lord.
I will be your love and support regardless, just as He is mine.
And if you hurt me or abuse my friendship, I will tell you
And not allow you to do so.
Instead I will draw our attention back to the cross
And the Friend who hung on it for you and I.

Thank you for being a part of my life,
Even in the painful part…
Thank you for allowing my Lord to help me grow.
And Lord, my Father, I thank You for thinking of me
Enough to teach me, to protect me, and to stand up for me.
Thank You for never leaving me or thinking less of me.
I will try to think more of others and their pain
Whenever I am consumed with mine.
I love You.

6-18-2000 Sunday
Written by Gail Brookshire
Inspiration: getting past the bitterness

Easter Is Coming

Easter is coming and I’m so sad.
I’ve completely lost the pizazz I had.
Why do I worry so much when I should see
Jesus is the one who suffered, not me.
This is a time to remember what He did,
To learn why and never take it for granted.
His blood poured to the soil to cleanse my soul.
The spear lanced through His side, makes me whole.
Hands and feet nailed to a wooden cross for our gain.
He gave His love by bearing the pain.
This is something we tend to neglect,
A treasure of life many will reject.
Easter is a time to remember and feel
The sacrifice of love is our daily meal.
We should live for Jesus every day,
And never let the price He paid go away.
This Easter won’t you take just one minute
And try to honor the true meaning in it.

4-12-1990 Thursday
Written by Gail Brookshire

Thank You For The Love

Thank You, Sweet Jesus, for the love in this world existing in every soul.
Though it may be rare we share with each other, it is a treasure to hold.
Thank You, Lord, for the care of every heart alive who try to do their best.
For many souls are led astray and become your newest test.
If everyone would take a chance and make the first step out,
They would see how much love is in the world, and they would not have their doubts.
But as it is, we are all fooled with the lie of how we’re all so wicked.
No one trusts the other one when concern is expressed. So when the love comes in, we all tend to miss it.

Written by Gail Brookshire

That’s What Friends Are For

That’s what friends are for…
A shoulder to cry on,
A friend in need,
Someone to rely on,
Moral support and great concern,
A pal to share a snack,
Someone to cheer you on
Or pat you on the back,
A dream to share,
A game to play,
Drink a shake,
Once a day,
Someone close to whisper,
And help you do your chores,
Someone to stand by you.
That’s what friends are for.

Written by Gail Brookshire
PS. What a Friend We Have in Jesus! ❤
God is my hero!

Climate Royalty

Shut the door, it’s cold outside.
You must not let the heat subside.
Only certain heroes fall.
I am different from them all.
If you think you’ve gotten in,
You should just think again.

Written by Gail Brookshire
PS. Let me go!
Thank you, Jesus, for getting through and setting me free! <3
God is my hero!

Night Writers

Friends of suicide.
Souls of the misunderstood.
Many thought they escaped.
If only they could.
Turning back the clock
Is a dream to the world.
Everyone is a prisoner to love.
The key is our search.
Friends of the future,
I warn you of death.
It is not the answer.
It’s only your last breath.

Written by Gail Brookshire
PS. God is our escape, the answer to life and death!
He waits to free you!

It’s Your Decision

God is such a caring man, He doesn’t even ask
That You would be His child, if to you it is a task.
He gives an opportunity to choose your own path,
And when you opt to walk away, it only makes Him sad.
He’s waiting at the gate for you, a paradise at hand.
Won’t you give a little love and try to understand?

Written by Gail Brookshire

Jesus – Die Again?

Jesus, He’s there waiting for us.
Just waiting to give us love.
Would you want to reject Him
And refuse to receive heaven above?
If you’re aware of the things He’s done,
Why would you turn Him away?
What would it take to let Him in
And offer Him to stay?
What more could you ask for
In such a caring friend?
What more could you want?
Do you want Him to die again?

Written by Gail Brookshire

How Do I Know You Care

Simply holding me for one.
Sticking around would be another.
To talk with me as a friend,
Instead of using me as your lover.
To be interested in what I have to say.
For it to be your choice to want to stay.
To know when I’m lying about my mental health,
When what I’m doing is protecting myself.
To make me cry when I continue to laugh.
To give me your all and never half.
To say you care about my distrust.
And to let me have you to trust.

Written by Gail Brookshire
Inspiration: TW challenging me to write about how I know someone cares. It’s interesting to look back at what I thought over almost 30 years ago. God does amazing things to heal our way of thinking! God is my hero! ❤

To Have And To Hold

So many times I have dreamed for someone to hold me, sometimes of being held by someone who loves me.
Sometimes I have went as far as to hurt myself and break my own heart in desperation to feel that special.
Yet all along there has been Someone holding me who loves me so much that He stretched out His arms and died for me.
He loves me so much, He’s there for every hug I need.
He is so full of love that He stretched out His arms and died for my family, my friends, strangers, and everyone in the world.
So many times He’s tried to keep me from breaking my own heart.
So many times He’s urged me to be careful.
But I in my stubbornness have insisted I knew what was best, and in the end broke my heart and His.
Did He leave me? Get tired of fooling with me?
Get angry? Did He stop holding me?

He opened His arms even wider, held me even tighter, and told me He would always love me.
Then He reminded me of how much love He gave to me.
He reminded me of all the people in the world who feel they have no one who loves them.
All they want is a hug.
They want to feel special to someone.
Some just want to matter to someone else.
He taught me how to open my arms to “give” love.
As He had me recollect my memories, I saw I have had a million or more hugs in my life.
And while they may not have all meant the world to me, I remembered (and in some cases first realized) how much they meant to the world.
The love felt within those embraces brought back the tears I’ve shared with many of God’s children in sorrow.
Sometimes they were tears of joy.

God made me realize I was not put on this earth to be loved.
He already loved me from birth.
I was given life that I might share love with others.
I need to share with them the most important love of all, the love of Jesus Christ Our Lord.
There are so many people in the world suffering from hunger, loneliness, abandonment, a feeling of worthlessness, and the desire to be loved.
Who am I to dwell in such self pity from thinking “Oh, what if I never love again?”
If God is in my heart and I try to reach out for Him, I will be loving others every day of my life.
Why do I selfishly whine to myself “What if no one ever loves me?”
If I believe that God sent His Son to die for me and that Jesus chose to do it, surely I know They both acted out of love, and will never stop loving me.
Jesus’ blood and love binds me forever.

True love… it’s what I waste my God’s valuable time daydreaming of, but true love follows the love of God, and yearns to share it with the suffering and lost so that they may know of love.
True love… honors Jesus Himself with a love of obedience, and a love filled with compassion for those whom He died for.

So many times I’ve dreamed for someone to hold me, sometimes of being held by someone I love.
I have often wondered “What if I die never being held again?”
But God has burdened my heart with the sorrow of souls who are dying to be held just once.
I want to comfort those souls with the arms that God gave me.
I want to give them the love that Jesus shares with me.
I want to do everything God knows me to be able to do for the people that my Savior Jesus Christ died for.
I want them to know that Jesus loved them enough to shed His blood for them.
I see that God did not intend for me to be held, but to hold.
As I strive to do His will, I take comfort in knowing He will always be there to hold me in His loving and faithful arms.

7-14-1998 Tuesday
Written by Gail Brookshire
Inspiration: When I went to the nursing home to visit my Aunt Mildred, a lady in her facility saw me hug my aunt and mentioned how lucky she was to get a hug. When I hugged the lady, she started crying as she thanked me. She held onto me so. And I held onto her. I cried all night for her. The Lord opened my eyes to so many people in the world who long for a hug. I have witnessed many children so abused by their parents or by whomever their parents abandoned them to never receiving hugs. Some children are so starved for hugs that it makes them an easy target for molestation and/or prostitution. Even grown adults can be so starved for a simple hug that it can lead to choices one would never think they would make, and some never able to get away from those choices. How much we need to be willing to give that hug. How much people need to know that God loves them! ❤


God Sends Love

God sends love and the world is beautiful.
God sends mercy and He saves the ugly.
God sends grace and the ugly is revived.
God sends peace and the heart takes comfort.
God sends comfort and the world is at peace.
How many more blessings from God I could count.
Everything He does is out of love.
Everything about Him is love.
He is love.
There’s no other love I’d rather have.
For His love allows me to love,
To be loved,
And to share love.
Thank You, Jesus, for loving me,
And everyone else.
You really know what love is.
Thank You for teaching me about love,
And allowing me to be a part of it.
The world is so beautiful.
God sends You to earth,
And the world is given salvation,
The world is given love,
I pray I’ll always show You love,
And share Yours with others.

6-7-1998 Sunday
Written by Gail Brookshire

A Day Apart

A day apart and I already miss you.

We haven’t known each other long,

But it’s long enough to miss you.

You make my day a brighter place.

You uplift me with a love from God.

You inspire my energy with your invisible smile.

There are times when a day gets tough,

And a week seems like a tragedy.

But God brings people together

And they share in pleasant company.

How do you know to make me laugh?

You don’t even know me.

And if I knew you,

I would never have to wonder.

Do you miss me at all?

Do you even care what I am doing

When we are not in conversation?

Do I even cross your mind?

I hope so because I do miss you.

And even though we have spent a day apart,

It feels like an unhappy day.

May you and God share quality moments,

Your friend in Christ.


4-27-1998 Monday
Written by Gail Brookshire

Surviving With You

God, here we are again.
It’s weeks later… hours passed, and nights of moments alone.
We’ve made it through so many hours.
I’ve not cried as much as I have before.
When I do, it feels like I’m growing past not falling apart.
The nights I cry myself to sleep are not as many,
And when I do I still know we’re doing good.
Yes, it still hurts just as bad as the day it all came to be,
But that is because of the person You made me to be.
God, thank You for making me the kind of heart
That when I love someone that I truly love them
And cannot just get over it.
It breaks my heart to know a love I believe in cannot be.
It hurts to know someone can love me one day and not the next,
But I still love him anyway.
I’ll always love him, God.
When I say I love someone forever, I mean forever.
I’m glad You made me that way.
But I know so well how You have taught me many times
That just because we love someone it doesn’t mean we can be together.
We will always lose people we love.
Thank You, God, we’ll never lose You.
Thank You for loving me… yesterday, today, and forevermore.
Thank You that I know You will never leave and will always be there
As You have been the last few weeks.
I could have never survived without You.
You were the only way to make it.
I know I will continue to fight the good fight.
You are so worth it.
You have so much faith in me when I tend to have so little faith in You.
You amaze me.
With Your love in my life, I know we’ll be just fine.

10-16-98 Friday
Written by Gail Brookshire
Inspiration: God brought me into the most beautiful relationship with my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ through the last 20 years since! ❤ Best relationship I’ve ever had!

Forgiveness Is A Real Comfort

Sin is real. It’s so real, it’s scary.
It’s scary how it has so much control.
It’s scary how it has a grip on me.
It’s scary that I seem to have a grip on sin.
Whether it’s lying, stealing, or coveting
sin is something that God hates.
And for that reason alone, I know that hell is real.
Eternal condemnation is real.
The reality of it’s existence is scary.
It’s so scary to know it wants me.
It’s so scary to know it waits for me to fail.
How scary to know that Satan can make evil
such a pleasurably and comforting feeling.
It’s scary to know that he smiles in the dark
to know he has yet lured me again.
Forgiveness is so real. It’s a comforting thing.
It too waits for me and smiles,
but thank God because it’s a part of Christ’s love.
It’s so comforting to know it embraces me.
It’s so comforting to know it rescues me.
It’s so comforting to know it cleanses me.
And most of all, it comforts me to know
it strengthens me and makes it possible to resist sin.
Forgiveness makes me a new person.
And that is a real comfort.

7-4-01 Written by Gail Brookshire
(by the grace of God)