Moving On from 1994 to 1995

Lord, As I move on from adding my poetry written in 1994 to adding the poetry written in 1995, I want You to know how grateful I am to You for bringing me through such hard times. I’m glad You had me too distracted with life to realize just how broken and hurt I was. How deep, dark, and sometimes so evil those words were, but they were expressing the thoughts in my mind, the words and experiences I had collected, and the emotions I tried to push away with a pen. Thank You for coming into my life, my heart, and my soul… for teaching me of Your love and Your ways. Thank You for understanding my tears when no one else can… when the words get in the way… and all I can feel is my sin. Thank You for the many whispers of love that You speak into my life. ❤
Thank You seems so inadequate but is absolutely applied.

He Understands My Tears by The Isaacs

It’s hard to believe He still loves me
Knowing how wrong I have been
When all I can say is I’m sorry
When all I can feel is my sin
He understands when all I do is cry
He feels the hurt that no one can see down inside
And when the words get in the way I know He still hears
For He understands my tears.

You may not believe that I’m broken
For all you can see is my smile
Oh but He hears the heart that’s unspoken
And He gives me strength through each trial

He understands when all I do is cry
He feels the hurt that no one can see down inside
And when the words get in the way I know He still hears
For He understands my tears.

Oh when the words get in the way I know He still hears
For He understands when no one else can
He understands my tears.

Allison’s Love for God

Allison was strolling along the beach, looking over the ocean.
Birds flew above in the open sky.
Cool waters splashed over her feet.
Dreams were playing with her mental friendliness.
Every time she heard the ocean splash against the sands, it reminded her of her sudden heartache.
For it wasn’t too long ago, she had trusted the hero of her life, the soul she had always searched for, and the man who always promised to love her because without her he wouldn’t want to live, that he wouldn’t want to be alive, that he wouldn’t be able to breathe, think, or even smile for one lonely moment of his ever dying life that would fade with the sunlight that awakened them every morning in their bed of paradise that was created by the sole emotion and feeling of love being the food that fed their hungry.
God had not told her she would awaken one morning to this promise.
He had filled her with the strength to survive though.
In every thing she remembered sad, He reminded her of the good.
Jesus had been her best friend, and in this case her comfort.
Knowing that gave her an inner peace.
Little did she know God was bringing her a new true hero to her near future.
Maybe it would be awhile before He revealed it to her, but He would.
Nevertheless, the ocean and the sun were such sweet lovers to her sense of being loved.
Only God could provide this beauty, and she knew it.
Paradise was right before her, all around her.
Quickly, she ran into the shallow waters.
Running, she felt so in love with a love that truly loved her too.
She would never be able to find this in a man,
This was something only God could give.
Unless, of course, God gave her the man who could love her like this.
Viewing the sun glistening over the waters, she stood waist deep in the sea.
Waters waded back and forth around her body, rocking her playfully.
“X marks the spot in heaven,” she thought.
“You’ll never be able to take me away from God,” she whispered to the world.
Zack would be the name of the man that God had sent running along the beach, to soon find the lady that Zack had always dreamed of sharing his God with him.

Written by Gail Brookshire
Inspiration: Creative Writing challenge, Spring Class 1994
Taught by E.P.
In thought of Randee’s best friend Allison who was killed in a car accident.

With Your Holy Presence

God, if there’s one thing people can share
When they’re not in love… it’s You.
They can hear Your word, sing Your praise,
And feel as good as new.
When they search for answers to their prayers,
In times of their needs,
They can find a love in comfort,
From simply getting down on their knees.
As their hearts break from a cruel lover’s game,
It starts to mend with care.
And never again will that evil win,
Against Your Holy presence being there.
Thank You for a subject, a smile,
A way to communicate.
I trade with You my old worldly way
Of having to fornicate.
Never have I felt a love, a hug, or touch
That really felt sincere.
I know with You in my heart,
I”ll never shed a wasteful tear.
Blessed are the ones who prayed,
Knowing I wanted to be saved.
I pray for all the other sould,
Who almost took me to my grave.

11-24-1994 Friday
Written by Gail Brookshire

Life Was Laying On The Floor

Life was laying on the floor.
Would mine be anymore?
I didn’t know… no one knew,
But I couldn’t even move.
All I could do was breathe.
So afraid I was dying, about to leave.
I was so scared, so stuck.
Was my life running out of luck?

Written by Gail Brookshire
Inspiration: my first time hyperventilating years ago.
I’m so thankful for God seeing me through those times.
Thank you, C.S.

Trapped In a Moment of Separation

Sweet sounds… music and the night.
It almost feels as if everything’s alright.
Is it?

Light tunes… a note and a little bass.
There’s nothing that could take your place.
Is there?

So many miles away… we lay alone,
Thinking of each other and talking on the phone.
Don’t we?

Honey… it’s just a matter of insecurity.
But that’s just not meant for you and me.
Is it?

I know you think of me… as I do you.
Spending time together, there’s nothing we’d rather do.
Is there?

Trapped in a moment of life… separation.
We hold on with hope, love, and desperation.
Don’t we?

7-26-1994 Tuesday
Written by Gail Brookshire
Inspiration: God loves and lives.

Second Date

Second date.. What does that mean?
Does that mean you want to go out with me again?
Or that you just want to be with me again?
Do you want to talk with me more?
Or do you just like my company?
There’s nothing wrong with both, but I thought I’d just ask.
Nosey little me, I was curious.
I’m wondering what it is that made you want to come up and talk to me,
But you’ve already given me a reason for that
And I believe you.
Why would you lie to me? Or would you?
You seemed very nice.
So what is it that you like?
Do you see something you want?
Could you be slightly interested in meeting more of me…
All of me?
There’s so much to know.
But then who needs to know everything?
Mysterious is a good quality for someone to hold.
Why shouldn’t I?
You’re something I should hold.
Or should I?
Should I want to?
What if I did? Would you care?
If I didn’t, would you dare?
It could be a game,
But then that would be a shame
Because you’re really nice
And unworthy of a price.
How could you place a value on someone so kind?
Are you not that kind of a person?
Who am I? What am I? And why am I to you?
Have you not yet seen or understood
How easily I am confused?

5-12-1994 Friday
Written by Gail Brookshire

Demonic Virtues

There’s a beautiful struggle in a wicked love,
For a rebellious faith is a faithful heartache.

Hot ice, cold fire, death in sex.
You’re such a tasty venom.

Dying alive in your malicious kiss,
Your sweet blood is forever falling.

A wicked touch in such a deceptive friendship,
Such devious kindness

Within every one of your evil longings
I find such demonic virtues.

Yet within the shallow depth of your prison of freedom,
I’m shattered dreams.

A loving hate can be an aching pardon.
Your death is such a romance.

5-3-1994 Tuesday
Written by Gail Brookshire
PS. This was written as a strong play on oxymorons to emphasize a strong struggle going on inside of life seeming to be nothing but a lot of things that just don’t make sense and simply should not be! The title itself are two words that just don’t belong together. I am so grateful that God’s love makes life make sense.