The first time I thought of myself as a SELF I guess,
Was when I first realized I had something to hide,
Be ashamed of,
And something to fear from someone else.
Knowing others could escape it, change it, or defeat it,
Was something to make me feel like I was all bad myself,
And by myself in a world of good and bad people.
But also somehow I knew I was not guilty,
Had no reason to be ashamed,
And that even though I feared it,
As soon as I grew up I would defeat it,
And never worry about it again.
But also, in a little way felt like I was the only one who knew
Why I had nothing to be ashamed of, or fear.
It was a great, wonderful miracle of GOD to discover the world agreed with me
Because when I grew up it made me feel so much better about myself,
And about the world and myself getting along.
Now I’ve learned to love myself and others,
Even more, the best things… Life and GOD.
Life was what I hated, and GOD I never knew.
Now they are my favorite inspirations,
My only hope for survival and eternity in love.
3-17-1994
Written by Gail Brookshire
Inspiration: assignment from Creative Writing Class, Spring 1994.
Taught by E.P.